Buttons Have Been Declared Enemies of the State

Jeremy Caplan writes in this week's Time Notebook column about the army's new uniforms

The new duds substitute Velcro and zippers for buttons, which used to snag on gear.

Okay, wait a minute. Let's think this out.

You're a soldier. You're trying to creep up on a sniper who's shooting people. As you approach him, you realize that you need to reload your gun, and your bullets are in your pocket. You cautiously reach towards your ammo pocket, and start to pull it open ...

RRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!

Unless they've invented silent Velcro, this doesn't exactly seem like a wise design choice to me.

(On another, entirely nonpolitical note, learned something a bit sad about Keanu Reeves yesterday, of all people.)